Tag: parenting

  • Facebook Adds GIFs and Live Video to the in App Camera

    Facebook Adds GIFs and Live Video to the in App Camera

    If your Facebook feed is like mine there are only one or two people using the FB Stories feature at any given time. Instagram and Snapchat pretty much own the story market but Facebook is still chasing that “all inclusive social media app” unicorn.  Today, the app updated to include the ability to go live from the FB Story camera, to turn your images/video into a nifty GIF, and to share text over a colored background. (Much like the text status backgrounds available on your FB timeline.) It’s a bit surprising that the story feature hasn’t caught on as quickly on Facebook as it did on Instagram which has more users on Stories than Snapchat has over their entire app. There are more people using Facebook every day but they seem to prefer the timeline method to the 24-hour stories.

    One thing is certain, however, the apps that are popular with the younger crowd are the ones that get the most out of their stories feature. Facebook is, obviously, trying to attract that same crowd again since their average user’s age has increased over the past several years. Buffing up Facebook Stories is an attempt to reach out to that exact demographic. We’ve seen a small surge in the number of younger users to join or re-join Facebook but it’s nowhere near the growth that we’ve seen on Instagram and Snapchat.

    What Parents Should Know

    You still can’t take Facebook off of your apps to watch list. Your kids most likely prefer Instagram or Snapchat (if you allow them to use it) but some of these new features, which are designed to attract the teen and pre-teen demographic, could draw some kids back to Facebook. My advice is for parents to have their teen’s login information and to check in every now and then. You’ll want to see what messages they’ve received and what is showing up on their and their friend’s story. For many younger people, the fact that their parents use Facebook is a deterrent for them but some of the camera features and other new additions could cause them to change their minds. It’s important that you know if they have a Facebook account and keep an eye on what is going on there.

  • The S.A.F.E. Approach to Raising Digital Natives

    The S.A.F.E. Approach to Raising Digital Natives

    The globalization of our world has led to so many benefits for our children. Endless information at their fingertips, education can be more exciting and entertaining, and distant family and friends are only a few screen taps away. With every benefit, however, comes a new challenge. Adult content, cyberbullying, sexting, and access to strangers and predators are changing statistics in our world and not for the better. Physiologists are calling our kids digital natives. They will never know a world that isn’t ruled by the screen, the like button, the selfie, and the Google search. It can seem like such a scary world but there are ways to keep our kids safe. We, as parents, just have to take the initiative to learn and apply a strategy. We at BecauseFamily.org call that strategy S.A.F.E.

    S.A.F.E. stands for Setup, Accountability, Filtering, and Education. It should be an easy way to remember the steps you must take to give your kids access to the technology that can enhance their lives while still setting boundaries that will keep them from the dangers of being always connected to the entire world. Let’s unpack the S.A.F.E. strategy.

    Setup

    The developers of your computer, tablet, and smartphone know that you need some sort of way to keep your kids safe while they use their device. Because of this, almost every device on the market now has some sort of Parental Controls built into the operating system. This means that parents should be able to implement some sort of safety strategy on their devices without spending any money or downloading any extra software.

    There are some exceptions, for instance, Android phones didn’t get built in parental controls until the 7.1 version of the operating system and Windows didn’t get it right until Windows 8. My advice is to find out what operating system your device is running and do a google search for parental controls on that OS. Once you’ve found what’s available, set them up immediately. This will give you, while basic, some protections on the tech that your children use.

    Accountability

    The easiest way to explain the benefit of accountability software is by describing a high-security building. The alarm is set, the doors and windows are closed, locked and break proof. There is even a super high tech laser grid that will set off the alarm if you cross its path. There are still, however, cameras installed. The cameras show you what went on when the rest of the security breaks down. Accountability software is the security camera of your internet safety plan. Accountability software doesn’t block content, it reports inappropriate websites to a pre-determined accountability “partner” through a text or email. This allows you to see what has gone on if something unsavory has been accessed on a computer or other device under your care. When you’ve seen what was found you will be able to have conversations with those you’re holding accountable and take the necessary actions to keep that kind of “breach in security” from happening again.

    Filtering

    Web filters DO block content. The idea is to let the good things in the internet pass through while filtering out the bad. There are three levels of filtering available on most devices. The first is the built in filters, these are usually pretty basic with an on off switch and not much customizability.

    Secondly is the option to purchase and download third party software that will block content. These options usually give you a bit more control and let you set filter levels by age, ratings, or content type and keywords.

    Third, you have your whitelist and blacklist settings. Most built in filters have this option but it takes your filter to the next level. Putting a website link in your black list will make it inaccessible on the device that the filter is set up on. This is useful if a site doesn’t necessarily have adult or dangerous content on it but you don’t want your kid or teen visiting the site. For instance, they watch too much YouTube and got bad grades. You can just blacklist the YouTube website on their devices and watch the studying commence.

    Whitelisting is the opposite. This allows you to either give a free pass to sites that have been blocked previously by your filter or some filters let you set up a browser to only view websites on the whitelist. I use this for my older kids to use my laptop. They only use three or four websites so that’s all that’s on the whitelist. The rest of the internet is completely closed to them. Filters are the initial protection phase of internet safety. It’s your first line of defense and should be the second step you take…the first is education.

    Education

    This phase really has two parts to it: research and conversation. Parents should give time every day to researching some of the latest information pertaining to internet safety. One good way to do this is the tech blog that I write found at safe.BecauseFamily.org. This site has daily tech news, up to date tutorials, and even a podcast recapping the week’s family relevant technology stories. I also recommend doing a regular Google search for a “dangerous app list.” You’ll often find some of the accountability and filtering resources have put together lists to help parents identify misleading or dangerous apps.

    Conversation is the key to this entire plan. If you aren’t transparent with your kids or teens about your plan for internet safety it will not work. I never recommend sneaking around to monitor your kids’ internet activity. In my experience, you’re much better off having them on your team. Discuss healthy tech habits with your kids and let them help you work through your plan and consequences for breaking the boundaries you’ve set up.

    Finally, remember that this plan is fluid. It’s going to work if you put effort into it but things do change. It’s critical that you stay informed on what’s going on in the technology world. When I do workshops to help families with these tech topics the questions are the most relevant and interesting part of the meetings. I recommend looking up our website and shooting us an email if you have any questions. Definitely, keep an eye on our blog at safe.BecauseFamily.org and learn all you can about the digital world your kids are growing up in. It can be hard work and seem overwhelming but there is no task that will bring more positive change.

    Bio

    K. Michael Prince is a husband, father of 4, blogger, speaker, author, and podcaster. He wrote “What’s in Your Pocket? A parents guide to protecting your children online.” and is the lead editor for a family tech blog (safe.BecauseFamily.org.) He is the director of BecauseFamily, a non-profit that works to empower and equip parents to be the first influence in their kids lives and train parents on raising digital natives.

    To learn more about how to host a workshop (in person or skype) at your home, church, or organization, contact us using the info below.

    Email: BecauseFamily@gmail.com

    Or go online to BecauseFamily.org

  • Disney Being Sued for “Spying on Children”

    Disney Being Sued for “Spying on Children”

    Disney is in the news again and this time it’s for spying. Apparently, over 40 of the smartphone/tablet games released by Disney have ad tracking built in. That is usually not a surprise when you’re using an app but when the apps are intended for children it changes the game completely. The Children’s Online Privacy and Protection Act puts certain limits on what a website or app are allowed to do with information collected from individuals under 13 years of age. Using their information for ad tracking isn’t allowed under COPPA guidelines and a resident of California is taking the company to court because of this policy.

    AvengersNet, Beauty and the Beast, Cars Lightning League, Club Penguin Island, Disney Gif, Frozen Free Fall, and many more apps have all been discovered to be collecting data entered by the children using the apps so that Disney can sell it to advertisers. This information is then used to easily target children with these advertiser’s marketing campaigns. Information such as geolocation, age, web history, email address, and full name are collected in many of these games and are quite valuable to marketing companies. Disney can also use this information to better target the advertising built into their own apps.

    Disney has paid fines for misuse of information before. In 2011, Playcom, a Disney subsidiary paid 3 million in fines for collecting email addresses, full names, and other information from minors.  There’s obviously money to be made from collecting personal information. The question is how can we keep this from happening to our kids?

    What Parents Should Know

    This is why so many apps are free. You’re not paying with money but you’re paying with information. When you or your kids use an app, you should always assume your information is being collected. Sites and apps save passwords, email addresses, and usernames to use on their site but they don’t have to just store that information. They can use that info to make more money as well. There is no way to avoid having the information you enter into apps, software, and websites collected for purposes outside of your control. The key is to control what information you put into those apps.

    There are browsers and plugins that will help you avoid ad tracking. You can search with DuckDuckGo instead of Google, for instance. You can install the AdBlocker extension for Google Chrome to keep some sites from taking your information. The problem is that many of these sites know that blockers are in effect and won’t release all of the features of their site until you disable them. Apps come with tracking built in so there isn’t really any way to avoid letting them take your information. My advice is to only enter information that you would be willing to make public. If you wouldn’t put it on an advertising survey for some company then you shouldn’t enter it into their site or app either.

    As for your children, you have to take the same precautions as you would yourself. In fact, consider being even more strict with the information you enter into the apps your children use. Don’t let them use their real full name or their social media account usernames. Don’t allow them to enter their email address or any contact information. You should enter whatever info you would for yourself and then allow them to use the app. I have a “family” email address that I use for apps or software that want an email address from my kids. My children don’t even know the address or login information, it’s strictly to use for logging in to a couple of the educational or silly game apps they like to use. These are a few of the things you can do to protect your kids from being tracked for advertising. It’s important that they understand that whatever information they enter online will immediately be outside of their control. Teach them to keep private things private. This will protect them from so much more than just advertising.

     

     

  • How Your Kids Can Hide Texts

    How Your Kids Can Hide Texts

    One of the major issues facing our teens these days is sexting. Statistics say that one of every ten teenagers admits to having sent naked pictures of themselves to someone. Sometimes our kids use social media to do this. They’ll send photos and inappropriate messages in the private messaging features of these social media platforms. Sometimes, though, your kids just use text messaging to do it. There are several tools out there to allow you to monitor what texts your kids are sending but there are a few ways they can hide their texts, even from the security you’ve set up. Here’s what they’re doing.

    Deleting text history.

    This seems pretty obvious but you’d be surprised how oblivious some parents can be. If there aren’t any text messages in your kids’ messaging app, or if it looks like they’ve only chatted with you, they’ve probably deleted their messages. This doesn’t always mean they’re up to something naughty but it does mean you should be having a conversation with them. Deleting their messages is a bad habit to allow them to get into for a number of reasons. First, it looks like they’re hiding something. They don’t want you to be suspicious of them any more than you want to creep around and spy on them. Secondly, they could be deleting conversations that can come back in the future. It’s not a bad thing to have written (or typed) evidence of these conversations, especially if they’re ever contacted by someone they don’t know. I advise you to encourage your kids not to delete texts. If you’re using a monitoring software that uses the iCloud backup (TeenSafe, mSPY) to monitor their texts then you could be missing what they’ve texted if they deleted them while outside of wifi and before a backup to the cloud. If you have a suspicion that text messages are being deleted then you should disallow the use of texting on their phone. If you can’t disable texting then don’t be afraid to take the phone away for a while. Most of all talk to your kids about the risks associated with keeping their conversations hidden. You should be here to help them and they need to understand that.

    Using Dummy Phone Numbers and Private Texting Apps

    Apps like TextBurner, Anonymous Texting, Buffalo Private Texting, and Smiley Private Texting can easily be used by kids and teens to hide the conversations they’ve been having. Not only do these apps require a pin number to access the text messages but many of them also allow you to set up a new phone number so that you can send and receive texts of calls anonymously. The apps descriptions mention job searches, Craigs List, and dating as some of the main uses for these private texting and dummy phone numbers. They do, however, advise against certain usese of the app and even warn of some of their policies for dealing with those who don’t follow guidelines:

     

    Screenshot from the Anonymous Texting App

     

    Check out this list of private texting apps for iOS.     —      Here’s a list of private texting apps for Android.

    Notice the warning about the age requirement? It says you must be 13 years old. If that’s so then why is the app rated for ages 4+? If you do a scan of all of the apps like this in iOS you’ll find that they’re all rated 4+. If you have your app store settings allowing your kid to download apps rated 9+ or lower or even 4+, they’d be able to download one of these apps, create a private and secret phone number that you don’t even know about and begin texting whoever they’d like. This is why I recommend using Family Link (for android phones OS 7 or higher) and iTunes Family Share to require your child to ask permission to download new apps. If you see any kind of app that says secret or private, or anonymous in the description I’d think twice about allowing them to download it. We have a major issue on our hands of kids sending images and texts that are very adult oriented. You, honestly, can’t keep an eye on every message they send on every app. This is why it’s important to limit which apps they’re allowed to use. It may cause that knockdown, drag out fight you’ve been trying to avoid but it’s better than filing a police report about some stranger who has been sending nasty pictures to your child.

     

  • PODCAST: Is Sarahah Meant for Your Teens?

    PODCAST: Is Sarahah Meant for Your Teens?

    Subscribe on iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/family-tech-weekly/id1231177225?mt=2 

    Sarahaha is an interesting app and it’s still gaining in popularity. In this episode, Michael and Melinda discuss the appeal of Sarahaha, the meaning of the word, and what we think parents should do about it.

     

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  • YouTube Adding Private Messaging

    YouTube Adding Private Messaging

    I spoke to a mother just a few days ago who was lamenting the idea of her son having his own YouTube channel. He didn’t post much but she was concerned about people finding him or learning about him through his videos. She was also concerned about bullying in the comments of his videos which is a real concern since YouTube commenters are notoriously ruthless. YouTube’s most recent update is going to either help solve or intensify these problems.

    YouTube begins rolling out a new update today that will bring private messaging to the video streaming app. The feature is an attempt to keep people on the YouTube app to discuss and share videos they’re viewing on YouTube. Currently, these videos are shared on other social media sites and discussed there but YouTube wants to play a larger role in the social game. Private sharing and chat will allow users to discuss videos and respond with more comments and even reply with another video. The biggest concern with this feature is that you can’t block users who try to contact you. You can, however, deny their requests to chat.

    What Parents Should Know

    Any app that allows private messaging should be taken seriously by parents. Kids of all ages love YouTube and the dangers of allowing them unsupervised access to user uploaded internet videos have been well documented. Adding the ability to send and receive private messages, while it can allow them to discuss videos with people they know without the risk of comment trolls bullying them, provides an opportunity for strangers or who knows who to contact our kids through YouTube. Since predators use social media to learn about and groom their victims, YouTube’s private messages could be a way for those ill meaning individuals to do their work.

    I advise that you allow your kids to watch YouTube on YouTube Kids only. If the videos they like aren’t available there then only let them watch on a browser on a computer. The other option is to share the YouTube account with your children and install the app on your own device. This way you can see who they’re messaging, what they’re talking about, and even be alerted when they receive a new message. I don’t ever recommend spying on your kids. My advice is that you discuss your parental control and monitoring methods with them so they know you’re there to look out for them. You’re supposed to be the safe place.

  • Should Your Kids Use Sarahah?

    Should Your Kids Use Sarahah?

    Sarahah is an app that snuck up the charts over the past weeks. It was originally put on the app store in June but is already sitting at number one on the free app charts in iOS. This app allows you to leave anonymous comments about people. The idea is that, since it’s completely anonymous, you can be honest and say what you really think. This can obviously lead to some really encouraging and uplifting posts, maybe it could cause a crush to reveal themselves, but definitely, it will cause mean people to do what mean people do. The risk of bullying on this app is very very high.

    This isn’t the first app of its kind but none have risen in popularity so quickly. “Sarahah” is the Arabic word for honesty, the app’s website describes the goal of the app simply:

    “Sarahah helps you in discovering your strengths and areas for improvement by receiving honest feedback from your employees and your friends in a private manner.”

    Again, the app is very new but development is happening fast (five updates since its June 13th release) and the app promises more features to come. Something like a planet icon on the bottom of the screen seems to hint at a future explore or discover page and they mention on their site that they’re studying an option to allow users to reply to the comments that come through Sarahah. The appeal of the app is obvious, most of us wish we could say whatever we are thinking to someone and there are also those of us that wish we could hear exactly what people think of us all the time. This may be fun or even cathartic for grown adults, but when teens and tweens are in the throes of development, hormones, and emotion, is this app a good idea?

    What Parents Should Know

    My Facebook feed has begun to blow up with Sarahah messages that have been screenshotted and shared. Most of the ones I see are people celebrating a super nice comment they got from someone but I’ve seen a few that were laughing at the commenter who was being a jerk. Those I’ve seen on Sarahah were adults, mostly because I don’t follow many young people on Facebook but there is no doubt, seeing this app climb the charts like it did, that there are younger users too. Parents should be cautioned that this app is rated 17+ for unrestricted web access, profanity, and adult humor. The issue is that since anyone who wants can post whatever they want (it’s called user generated content) it’s next to impossible to ensure there will be no adult content on the app. Secondly, I warn parents, as I did above, about the dangers of bullying through this app. The bully follows our kids around in their pocket and this app gives them the ability to say whatever they want without any way to identify who they are.

    There is already an epidemic of kids feeling like they can say whatever they want online without consequence. Unfortunately, that isn’t the case because the one reading what is written feels real emotions based on what’s been said. The ability to be completely anonymous could cause kids to be even crueler and could even lead to kids who wouldn’t say anything mean to some one actually doing it because they don’t see how they can be identified as the culprit. You can block users who you don’t want to message you anymore but once you’ve done that the damage could already be done.

    My advice is to disallow this app on your kids’ phones. You can do it the old fashion way by looking at their phone yourself and uninstalling that app if you see it. You can also set age restrictions in the app store or parental control/restrictions options on your kids’ devices. This should block Sarahah since it’s rated 17+. As an adult, maybe you enjoy this app, I would advise caution to you too. Not only are you putting yourself out there to be spoken to anonymously by anyone who could say whatever they want but you’re also setting an example for your kids.

  • Internet Safety Training in Your Home

    Internet Safety Training in Your Home

    I approached the mother of a family we have been friends with for a while and asked if she would be willing to host one of our first Digital Boundaries Workshops. She immediately began to tear up and say absolutely yes. I was thrilled but concerned and confused by her tears. She confessed that, while we had discussed setting up internet safety solutions in her home nearly a year earlier, we had never made the scheduling work and she felt horrible. Especially because her son, who was in third grade, had just been caught searching for information on some very adult topics online. A younger child on the school bus had told him what he should search for and curiosity immediately took over. “We need to do something as soon as possible.” she said, “I wish we hadn’t waited, I hope it’s not too late.” We did a workshop for her just a couple weeks later.

    This response is all too common. Our work for families gets far more attention from parents who’ve been through some kind of related struggle than those who want to set up preventative measures to keep their family from such a story becoming their reality. Our children are being called digital natives by psychologists. This is a label that identifies them as a generation that’s so used to technology, it’s like it’s their native tongue. If you’ve spent any time with a young child or teen you’ve probably been impressed with their ability to maneuver digital devices. It’s hard for parents to keep up. It’s even harder if you’re an older parent or a grandparent who feels left behind by the online world. My “Setting Digital Boundaries” living room workshop is an easy way to get some training that will set you on the path towards understanding the digital world your kids are growing up in. Starting next month (August 2017) these workshops will be available both live and through skype.

    What Happens at a Workshop?

    I jokingly tell people that our Setting Digital Boundaries Workshop is like a Mary Kay party. You invite your friends over and serve up some snacks. After everyone has had some time to arrive and say hello we begin the presentation. Instead of selling you make up I’ll be teaching you and your friends how to protect your children online. After updating you on some of the latest dangers and threats available to your kids online I teach you our internet safety plan that I call S.A.F.E. (Setup Accountability Filtering and Education)

     

    Each section of this presentation will be spent unpacking the four keys of our S.A.F.E. plan all the while highlighting some of the best resources you can use to protect your family. Each section ends with a time for questions. The sessions last anywhere from 40 to 60 minutes and afterward, I always stay available to answer more questions and give feedback on some of yours and your friends’ tech safety needs.

    These workshops are so valuable because of how quickly the internet safety atmosphere changes. Our book is helpful for getting you started and teaching you some of the terms that you need to understand to protect your kids online. A book, however, can’t give you step by step help with your internet safety goals. A blog post or YouTube video can’t listen to your specific internet safety needs and diagnose the best plan for protecting your family. That’s what makes Setting Digital Boundaries Workshops so critical.

    Email Us to book a workshop and go to BecauseFamily.org to learn more about what we teach and how you can partner with us financially to help us keep these workshops free.

  • Bullying in 2017

    Bullying in 2017

    Ditch the Label has released their annual bullying survey and the results aren’t surprising at all.  It seems that bullying is increasing and people feel more comfortable bullying online than offline. They surveyed over 10,000 people between the ages of 12 and 20. The people they surveyed all lived in the UK and could answer gender identity, race, religion, and other questions to help get information about the reasons behind bullying. You can see some screenshots of the results I found interesting below.





    Another interesting fact pulled from this study was that young people considered Instagram the most common social media site for bullying. Facebook came in a close second. The reasons for bullying varied greatly in the study with appearance and interests/hobbies being the most common and gender identity, sexuality, and religion all coming in near the bottom of the list. This is the largest study of its kind with some of the most extensive and well rounded results we’ve ever seen. This should be a great resource to parents, teachers, and school officials.

    What Parents Should Know

    I preach research and education for parents every single day. This is the kind of information parents need to be aware of. Notice that in the final screenshot about who kids went to when they were bullied, those who say they reported to a family member said they had the highest satisfaction in the support they received. Parents, aunts, uncles, grandparens, and everyone else with a family relationship to a young person need to be ready to have these conversations about bullying and how to handle it. It’s important to understand the issues facing your teens and to know how technology has escalated these issues.

    Go read up and learn all you can. You can see the entire report from Delete the Label on this PDF here.

  • Video Chatting Apps You Should Uninstall NOW

    Video Chatting Apps You Should Uninstall NOW

    Chat Roulette was a challenge that became its own website. The idea was that people could log on to the site and be connected with someone from around the world at random. The website isn’t as popular as it once was but there are many apps that simulate that experience and some of those apps are gaining popularity. Here are some of the ones climbing the app store charts. The ranking listed is for the Social Media category in the iOS App Store as of the publishing date of this article. I’ve only listed the live video or random connection chatting apps in the top fifty.

    Melon #14

    Melon is making the news as the latest video chatting fad. It connects you with new people based on social media friends and offers private messaging, video chat, and a people search feature. It’s gaining popularity and being featured in articles that are blasting it for the frequency of cyberbullying and the high concentration of males looking for girls that will do whatever they ask on camera.

     

    Live.Me #16

    Live.Me touts the ability to chat with stars and celebrities and broadcast to anyone all over the world. You can find anyone from anywhere or just look to see who is broadcasting around you. There is also the ability to search by topic or interest. Live.Me uses “gifts” and “diamonds” to allow you to share things with other users and even advertises the ability to “date” virtually through the app.

     

    Monkey #25

    I’ve written about Monkey before. This app was created by a couple of teens who dropped out of high-school to launch a tech startup. It quickly gained a reputation for having too much nudity and not taking some of the responsibility for the content found in the app. This app has been on the FamilyTechBlog uninstall list for a while now.

     

    MeetMe #35

    Formerly called “MyYearbook,” MeetMe is a app that advertises itself as a way to “meet new people.” The app uses your location to find people near you and information that you’ve entered to connect you with people who share your interests. It’s popular in the app store as it’s been around for quite a while and has the largest fan base. MeetMe offers private chat and video chatting as well as live video broadcasting.


    Climbing the Charts:

    YouNow #52

    Live stream video chat is pretty much all YouNow is about. You can broadcast yourself, find broadcasters, and even join the broadcast as a video guest. The app store listing calls for you to build your fanbase and become a YouNow celebrity. There are some complaints on in the reviews about accounts that have been reported for inappropriate content not being removed because they are popular on YouNow.

     

    CAM #56

    CAM is popular because it allows you to select the gender you’d like to chat with. It automatically connects you with someone and even automatically texts an invite to everyone on your contacts list without your permission. This practice has caused it to dip in the standings but some continue to use the app because they like the ability to chat or flirt with people they are attracted to.

     


    What Parents Should Know

    I don’t usually recommend any of these type of app for your teens or kids. Not only is it dangerous to connect with random people who could be broadcasting whatever they’d like for you to see. It’s also a problem because of the potential for predators. Any connection with strangers is dangerous. Some of these apps use your location to connect you and it’s therefore possible to meet people online that you may meet up with later. My advice is to uninstall any of these apps if you see them on your kids phones or tablets. There is no reason to use one of these apps to connect with friends since you can use Instagram or Facebook Messenger to do that now. Uninstall on sight.